Fie! Fie! (The Fair Physician)

Wilkie Collins


Fie! Fie! (The Fair Physician) Page 10

Once more, good evening.'

Salome was waiting at home, eager to know how the interview had ended. Mrs Crossmichael described it in these words:

'I have assumed the character, my dear, of your vindictive sister; eager to lower the man who has jilted you, in Sophia's estimation. The trap is set -- thanks to that charming girl, Sir John's daughter. To-morrow will show if Pillico walks into it.'

X To-morrow did show. Mrs Crossmichael received a reply to her letter, from Mr Fitzmark.

'I entreat you to intercede for me. No words can tell how ashamed I am of my conduct, and how I regret the inexcusable jealousy which led to it. Salome -- no! I dare not speak of her in that familiar way -- Miss Salome is too good and too noble not to forgive a sincerely penitent man. I know how utterly unworthy of her I am; and I dare not hope to obtain more than my pardon. May she be happy! -- is the only wish I can now presume to form.

'One word more, relating to myself, before I close these lines.

'I was foolish enough, when I made that ever-to-be-regretted visit, to hint at an obstacle to my entering the marriage state. It all originated in a mistaken view, taken by Miss Sophia Pillico, of the state of my heart. She called medically this morning, and applied the stethoscope as before: the result seemed to surprise her. She asked how many times I had taken my medicine, -- I said, Twice. Digitalis, she thereupon remarked, was a wonderful remedy. She also said that she might, in her anxiety, have taken an exaggerated view of my case, and have alarmed me without reason. Her conduct, after this, was so extraordinary that I cannot pretend to describe it. She waited, after the examination was over, and seemed to expect me to say something more. I waited, on my side, for a word of explanation. She flew into a rage, and told me to provide myself with another doctor. What does it mean?

'Being naturally interested in finding out whether there was anything the matter with me or not, I called on the resident medical man in this neighbourhood. He took great pains with me; and he admitted that I had an overburdened heart.

'God knows that this is true enough! But the cause assigned makes me blush while I write. It seems that I eat too much -- and my full stomach presses against my heart, "Live moderately, and take a long walk every day," the doctor said; "and there isn't an Office in London that won't be glad to insure your life."

'Do me one last favour. Pray don't let Miss Salome know about my stomach!'

Private Note by the Editor -- When Mrs Crossmichael showed this letter to her sister, she said, 'Now I have bowled Pillico out at last!' Quite a mistake. Sophia publicly alluded to her brief professional connection with Mr Fitzmark, in these terms: 'Other women view the approach of age with horror -- I look to it myself with impatience and hope. At my present time of life, stupid male patients persist in falling in love with me. Mr Fitzmark was a particularly offensive instance of this. No words can say what a relief it is to me to hear, that he is going to marry Miss Salome Skirton.'

Wilkie Collins

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